


A Most Exasperating Lug

by EntreNous



Series: Snarry Snippets [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Animagus, M/M, Suspicions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-11
Updated: 2011-09-11
Packaged: 2018-02-24 00:59:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2562263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EntreNous/pseuds/EntreNous
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It seems it's Ron coming between Harry and Severus.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Most Exasperating Lug

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from the Theodore Roethke poem, "[The Sloth](http://famouspoetsandpoems.com/poets/theodore_roethke/poems/16330)".

When Severus Snape opened his front door and spotted the back of Harry Potter's untidy head, he barely restrained himself from snatching those unruly locks to toss the unwelcome guest from his threshold.

"I thought I told you never to come back here -- what is _that_?"

For Harry had turned, an anxious look on his face, glasses askew, clothing rumpled. And in his arms he held a creature with large eyes, a short moist snout, and long legs, each of its limbs ending in two formidable claws. Yet despite its sharp toes the animal obviously posed little danger: it slid out a long pink tongue slowly as if tasting the air and then yawned.

"It's a -- he's a two-toed sloth. Please, you've got to help me," Harry began.

"I am in no way obliged to come to your aid; now, wherever you have obtained this thing, return it. It looks --" Severus paused. He had meant to say _dirty_ or _malodorous_. But somehow those aspersions melted when the creature laid his head endearingly against Harry's shoulder, and reached out curiously toward his new acquaintance.

Severus scowled. The beast favored him with a beatific quirk of his lips, obviously his version of a smile. Severus crossed his arms to communicate his displeasure. The sloth curled a set of claws around Severus's wrists with a gentle touch and tugged inquiringly.

"He likes you," Harry murmured, hiding a grin.

There was nothing for it. Severus held out his arms and accepted the creature, which at once swung in a lazy arc from Harry to him and settled against his chest.

"I presume this is your idiotic way of begging forgiveness, burdening me with _this_ as a gift," Snape hissed.

"Actually, no." Harry tugged at his hair anxiously, tousling it. "Not that I don't want that, because I do. Ask for forgiveness, that is. Severus, you have to believe, I never --"

"Why are you here?" Snape demanded even as he cradled the sloth with care.

"Look, it's Ron," Harry blurted.

Severus bristled as well he might, given Weasley had been the subject of their most recent argument, the one that ended with him ordering Harry never again to darken his doorstep. "What mess has Weasley gotten himself into?"

"Severus, no. I mean, _this is_ Ron," Harry clarified.

As the animal curled one of its limbs around his neck, Severus pressed his lips together so that he wouldn't look like an astonished idiot. " _That_ is why you insisted on departing all those weekends with Weasley?"

"Because I was helping him with his Animagus transformation. I know you haven't liked me leaving so often. Believe me, I wanted to tell you why. But Ron made me swear not to. Not even Hermione knew. And now we're in a right fix. He can't transform back, I've no idea what to try, and Hermione expected him home an hour ago --"

With a resounding _crack!_ , Hermione Granger-Weasley Apparated to the scene.

"Professor Snape, I do apologize for disturbing you, but -- oh, Harry, you're back!" A look of relief flitted over her face, only to give way to a frown. "But Ron's not home, and I'm --" She cut herself off, blinking. "Er, you have a sloth?"

When neither answered she came forward, hand lifted to caress the interested animal leaning her way. "Does he bite?" she asked.

"You'd know better than I," Harry muttered as he shifted the sloth toward her.

"Oh!" Hermione exclaimed as she took the sloth. "He's so --" She paused, staring at the creature. "Ron?" she asked incredulously.

"Er, surprise?" Harry tried.

Ron peered at her with obvious affection, and then laid his head down on her bosom and sighed.

"Of all the irresponsible -- to keep something like this from your _wife_ \-- " She took a deep breath and then crooned, "Oh, but isn't he adorable?"

In Ron's sloth-state it seemed the obvious answer was to snuggle himself asleep in his wife's welcoming arms.

Hermione couldn't keep from smiling. "He managed it then, didn't he? Ron became an Animagus, even though no one else from your cohort of Aurors has achieved it. It's amazing, isn't it, Harry?" She kissed her husband on his fuzzy head.

"Yeah," Harry answered, his shoulders sagging in relief.

"Managed it halfway, it seems pertinent to point out," Severus remarked.

"Oh, we'll set him to rights," she said briskly. "Thank you, Harry." She smiled. "At least this explains all those weekends away."

"Exactly," Harry said, shooting Severus a meaningful look.

Hermione laughed. "Do you know, even though I couldn't imagine Ron being unfaithful, I nearly concluded the two of you were having an affair? All that time together, and not a word of what you were doing! But I know you'd never hurt me that way, Harry. I ought not to have suspected either of you for a moment." She tugged Ron closer. "I'll owl you when we've managed to transform him back."

With that, she Apparated away with Ron in her arms.

Harry spun around with an alarmed look, his mouth working but no sound emerging. "You thought I was cheating on you?" he asked finally.

Severus refused to look at him. "You refused to explain repeated weekends spent only in his company."

Harry appeared stunned, but then he smiled. "Don't you know that about me, Severus?"

"What?" Severus asked stiffly.

"Like Hermione said. I'd never hurt you. Not if I could help it in any way." Harry stepped closer, and after a moment Severus allowed him to join their hands.

"I may have assumed too much," Severus allowed.

" 'Course, the way you were cuddling Ron, I ought to be jealous!" Harry joked.

"Perhaps you ought," Severus intoned, climbing the stairs to the house.

Harry stood stock still for a moment. Then with an indignant, "Hey!" he raced up the steps after Severus.


End file.
